Home and Back Again

I’m sure most of y’all know this, but for those who don’t my Mom went to be with Christ a couple weeks ago. It’s been a rough month or so for my family, but in it all God has been as good and loving as He’s ever been.

For us on the logistics team, our last few days in Turkey were incredible but also very exhausting and came with a lot of headaches, so our amazing leadership encouraged us to take a couple days off once we arrived in Georgia (the country, not the state). Our plane landed, the three of us found our airbnb and promptly collapsed. I woke up the next morning to a message that Mom’s health was declining fast and that I needed to think about coming home. As hard as this news was, it was sweet to be with two teammates I had just had powerful bonding experiences. 

From an entirely selfish standpoint, I did not want to go home. I’ve been surrendered to the World Race for months and had finally learned to love and enjoy it, and I didn’t want it to be ripped away from me so soon. And even more so, the idea of seeing my Mom slowly decline was terrifying. But I also knew that I wanted to be with my family, and that they wanted me to be with them. While I prayed in the morning I felt a calling to go home, but being the indecisive individual that I am I was very insecure in that decision.

Our squad leaders joined us that evening, and together we prayed over what I was supposed to do. They left the decision up to me but after praying they all advised me to go home and be with my family. In a final confirmation from the Lord, immediately after buying a ticket to Des Moines my big brother messaged me encouraging me to do the same.

The 30+ hours from Tbilisi, Georgia to Des Moines, Iowa were perhaps the most peaceful trip I’ve ever had. It’s uncanny how near God was. Even when some dog decided it didn’t like my pack and I got delayed in US customs for an hour and the time for my connecting flight to depart ticked past, I was fully confident that everything was okay. As it turns out the customs agent going through my pack had grown up in Iowa and we were able to put out home on a pedestal together.

Mom’s last few days on Earth were hard but sweet as we were loved very well by our friends and family. And being with her when she took her last breaths were oddly beautiful; I got the honor of watching her leave this world to be with her Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

And even from a logistical point of view, it was all perfect timing. I was already in a city with an international airport when I needed to go home, and just two days after Mom’s burial my squad is in the same city. Flying is easy for me, I’ve done it a bazillion times; but taking a bus across Eurasia to find my team while they’re in some remote Caucus village would have been terrifying.

Death is always heartbreaking, but all things work out for good for those who love God. God’s love and the gospel were presented so clearly at the funeral, and more than one person has asked our family questions about Christ in response to it.

I’ve been blessed in the past few weeks by loving family, friends, squadmates, churchmembers, long lost acquaintances who have been incredibly supportive, and I don’t want to belittle y’all’s help in anyway, but it has been God alone who has carried me through this. Even in the hardest of times, He still loves and cares for His children. Please call on Him in your lowest of times. Even if you don’t always “feel” Him, He’s there in every step.

I’m leaving tomorrow to reunite with my squad just in time for team changes (obligatory equally nervous and excited yay! for the latter), and just a day or two later we’ll travel to Uzbekistan. So far my every experience in Muslim-majority countries have been wonderful, and I’m hyped for next month. Prayers for smooth traveling and negative covid tests would be appreciated.